LADIES!! Feel Free to Copy and Print When Needed!!

APPLICATION FOR A NIGHT OUT WITH THE BOYS

Name of Boyfriend/Fiance/Husband:

I request permission for a leave of absence from the highest authority in my life for the following period:

Date: Time of departure: Time of return NOT to exceed:

Should permission be granted, I do solemnly swear to only visit the locations stated below, at the stated times. I agree to refrain from hitting on or flirting with other women. I shall not even speak to another female, except as expressly permitted in writing below. I will not turn off my mobile after two pints, nor shall I consume above the allowed volume of alcohol without first phoning for a taxi AND calling you for a verbal waiver of said alcohol allowance. I understand that even if permission is granted to go out , my girlfriend/fiance/wife retains the right to be pissed off with me the following week for no valid reason whatsoever.

Amount of alcohol allowed (units)

Beer: Wine: Liquor : Total:

Locations to be visited:

Location: From: To:
Location: From: To:
Location: From: To:

Females with whom conversation is permitted:

IMPORTANT - STRIPPER CLAUSE: Not withstanding the female contact permitted above, I promise to refrain from coming within one hundred (100) feet of a stripper or exotic dancer. Violation of this Stripper Clause shall be grounds for immediate termination of the relationship.

I acknowledge my position in life. I know who wears the trousers in our relationship, and I agree it's not me. I promise to abide by your rules & regulations. I understand that this is going to cost me a fortune in chocolates & flowers. You reserve the right to obtain and use my credit cards whenever you wish to do so. I hereby promise to take you on an unlimited shopping spree, should I not return home by the approved time. On my way home, I will not pick a fight with any stranger, nor shall I conduct in depth discussions with the said entity. Upon my return home, I promise not to urinate anywhere other than in the toilet, I will refrain from waking you up, breathing my vile breath in your face, and attempting to breed like a (drunken) rabbit.

I declare that to the best of my knowledge (of which I have none compared to my BETTER half), the above information is correct.

Signed - Boyfriend/Fiance/Husband:

Request is: APPROVED DENIED

This decision is not negotiable. If approved, cut permission slip below and carry at all times.………………………………................................................................................................................................................Permission Permission for my boyfriend/fiance/husband to be away for the following period of time:

Date: Time of departure: Time of return:

Signed - Girlfriend/Fiance/Wife:


APPLICATION FOR A NIGHT OUT WITH THE GIRLS

Name of Girlfriend/Fiance/Partner/Wife:

I'm going out!!

Signed: (me)

The Occasional Joke....

I wanted to do a joke of the day on here but realized I just can't get on here everyday. So I decided to just do the occasional joke. When I come across something funny, I will share it on here. I came across this cute joke at http://www.coolfunnyjokes.com/. I worked for attorneys some years ago and am quite fond of lawyer jokes. Enjoy!!

10 Husbands, Still a Virgin
A lawyer married a woman who had previously divorced ten husbands. On their wedding night, she told her new husband, "Please be gentle, I'm still a virgin." "What?" said the puzzled groom. "How can that be if you've been married ten times?"

"Well, Husband #1 was a sales representative: he kept telling me how great it was going to be. Husband #2 was in software services: he was never really sure how it was supposed to function, but he said he'd look into it and get back to me.

Husband #3 was from field services: he said everything checked out diagnostically but he just couldn't get the system up.

Husband #4 was in telemarketing: even though he knew he had the order, he didn't know when he would be able to deliver.

Husband #5 was an engineer: he understood the basic process but wanted three years to research, implement, and design a new state-of-the-art method.

Husband #6 was from finance and administration: he thought he knew how, but he wasn't sure whether it was his job or not.

Husband #7 was in marketing: although he had a nice product, he was never sure how to position it.

Husband #8 was a psychologist: all he ever did was talk about it.

Husband #9 was a gynecologist: all he did was look at it.

Husband #10 was a stamp collector: all he ever did was... God! I miss him!

But now that I've married you, I'm really excited!"

"Good," said the new husband, "but, why?"

"You're a lawyer. This time I know I'm gonna get screwed!"

Snow in Vegas!!

One more thing I forgot to mention. Towne Square on Las Vegas Blvd. and Sunset has an array of Holiday events for young and old alike. My favorite one is the Snow!! They make it snow in the center park every night at 7pm, Saturdays at 7 and 8pm. It is beautifully choreographed to Christmas music hits as well. To get the full list of events check out http://www.townsquarelasvegas.com/.

Where the Best Xmas Lights Are!!

Every Christmas I just have to see lights. It really puts me in the Holiday mood. So bundle up in your warmest coat and grab a to go cup of steaming hot cocoa and get ready for some holiday cheer!! My favorite place to go every year is THE GIFT OF LIGHTS at Sunset Park (Nov 15-Jan 1.) It gets bigger and better every year. Sunday thru Thursday 5-10PM and Friday thru Saturday including Holidays are 5-9PM. The entrance is on Eastern just before Sunset Road on the right. It is $13 per vehicle and $15 on the weekends (FRI & SAT.) However, if you bring a nice sized bag of clothing in good condition to donate to Goodwill, they give you $2 off. They also have hot cocoa for sale but I think it's a bit pricey for what it is. Next, there is the Bellagio Garden. It's always free and beautifully decorated for the Holidays. It's a nice little walk through. Another favorite is Opportunity Village's Magical Forest. All proceeds go to the people of Opportuinity Village which is really cool. It's located at 6300 W. Oakey Blvd. Hours are 5:30-9 p.m. Sun. - Thurs. and 5:30-10 p.m. Fri.-Sat. (Nov. 21 through Jan. 02.) General admission is $9.50 for adults, $7.50 for ages 3-11. An adult passport is $16 and a children's passport is $14 with access to unlimited rides. These are just a few of the many other things available. To get the full list and info. check out http://www.reviewjournal.com/entertainment/events/holidays/!!

Joke of the Day!

I found this on one of my favorite joke sites, so I thought I would share it with you. It's really cute!

Advantages Of Being A Woman
Why it's better to be a Woman!
1. We got off the Titanic first.
2. We get to flirt with systems support men who always return our calls, and are nice to us when we blow up our computers.
3. Our boyfriend's clothes make us look elfin & gorgeous. Guys look like complete idiots in ours. 4. We can be groupies. Male groupies are stalkers.
5. We can cry and get off speeding fines.
6. We've never lusted after a cartoon character or the central female figure in a computer game.
7. Taxis stop for us.
8. Men die earlier, so we get to cash in on the life insurance.
9. We don't look like a frog in a blender when dancing.
10. Free drinks, Free dinners, Free movies ... (you get the point).
11. We can hug our friends without wondering if she thinks we're gay.
12. We can hug our friends without wondering if WE'RE gay.
13. New lipstick gives us a whole new lease on life.
14. It's possible to live our whole lives without ever taking a group shower.
15. We don't have to fart to amuse ourselves.
16. If we forget to shave, no one has to know.
17. We can congratulate our team-mate without ever touching her butt.
18. If we have a zit, we know how to conceal it.
19. We never have to reach down every so often to make sure our privates are still there.
20. If we're dumb, some people will find it cute.
21. We don't have to memorize Caddyshack or Fletch to fit in.
22. We have the ability to dress ourselves.
23. We can talk to people of the opposite sex without having to picture them naked.
24. If we marry someone 20 years younger, we're aware that we look like an idiot.
25. Our friends won't think we're weird if we ask whether there's spinach in our teeth.
26. There are times when chocolate really can solve all your problems.
27. We'll never regret piercing our ears.
28. We can fully assess a person just by looking at their shoes.
29. We know which glass was ours by the lipstick mark.
30. We have enough sense to realize that the easiest way to get out of being lost is to ask for directions.

So Now What....

Okay, so I wouldn't say that my life is crazy interesting. However, sometimes things happen to me or I find out things or I may just have something I would like to share with whoever. So, I decided to start a blog. A few people I know have one, including my lovely and talented sister Kellie Knapp. Her's is really cool. You can see hers at www.richandkellie.blogspot.com. Anyways, I think that my blog will be fun. I'm thinking about doing a daily joke or funny story, crazy things that may be happening in the world or to me, fun events or things to do here in Vegas, etc. So first thing first, my name is Kacie Eversole. I am 27 years young and live in Henderson, Nevada with my crazy fun fiance Denis Romanchenko. And this is my new blog. Enjoy!!